RAW

Raw Results 1/23

Show opens with…. A PROMO! Sigh. Apparently Owens and Reigns will have a rematch for the title tonight or something… don’t know, not sure if I care…

Tonight… GOLDBERG is here! I could care less!!!

The RAW Tag Team Champions Ceasaro and his partner Sheamus hit the ring their opponents are Gallows and Anderson again? Oh this match is Cesaro vs Gallows in a singles match… After a bunch of nonsense, Gallows picks up the win. He didn’t deserve it. But Cesaro made him look good.

Backstage Mick Foley is talking to Stephanie McMahon about the title match tonight, Sami Zayn comes in to ask about his spot in the Rumble, but Stephanie tells him he has to earn his way in by beating Seth Rollins tonight. Stephanie asks to be taken off speaker phone. Mick agrees to tell Seth something…

Back from commercial, Interview with Bayley about her match with Charlotte at the Rumble for the women’s title. She speaks about working on the indies, and about Charlotte making fun of her fandom.

Another backstage promo, Mick Foley tells Seth Rollins that if Sami beats him tonight, he is out of the Rumble.

Seth Rollins vs Sami Zayn for a spot in the Royal Rumble this Sunday. This match is action packed as you would expect from these two, enjoying watching this match. Sami lays the Blue Thunder Bomb on Rollins but he kicks out, followed by two more near falls. Rollins may be down but not out. Zayn is truly coming into his own. Rollins manages to gain control, and does an over the top blockbuster, but Zayn kicks out. Rollins gets two more near falls, but Zayn kicks out. I’d watch this on a PPV. Its back and forth a bit more, Rollins ends up out over the top. Rollins makes it back to the ring on time. Rollins goes for a pedigree off the top rope, but Zayn reverses into a top rope sunset flip. Rollins kicks out. Both back to their feet, Zayn is in control, but Rollins cuts him off and Pedigrees him on the apron. Ouch. Rollins is about to pin Zayn, when HHH’s music hits… dumb ass falls for the typical bait and switch and gets rolled up by Zayn. No HHH. Stephanie your rotten.

After commercial we come back to Seth Rollins yelling at Mick Foley demanding to know who did this to him. Mick insists he didn’t do it and blames Stephanie.

Mustafa Ali, TJ Perkins, and  Gentleman Jack Gallagher  and  vs Drew Gulak Tony Nese, and Aryia Daivari, This is a super fast paced match ad I am too tired to properly cover it, ends with Ali pinning Gulak… Watch 205 Live to see more of these guys, they are great.

Back from break with The New Day! The come out to talk about the Rumble, then Enzo and Big Cass come out, this might be too much personality for one promo, don’t waste it all on one segment guys! Enzo and Big Cass announce they will also be entering the Rumble, then… Rusev‘s music hits, Hes also entering the Rumble. Then Titus O’Neil comes out, and The New Day tells him he promised not to interrupt them anymore, New Day offers to take it outside, Titus says its gonna be an 8 man tag… I have no idea who this one guy is in the ring or where he came from, I am so confused, Braun Strowman hits the ring.

So its the New Day with Enzo and Cass Vs Titus O’Neil, Rusev, The guy I don’t know, and Braun Strowman. So who is this guy? He isn’t even on the roster page? Are these promos so boring I can’t pay attention to who people are? IDK. Hopefully one of the announcers knows his name after the commercial. Oh its Jinder Mahal. Why doesn’t he have a roster page? I want to care, but so far this match is meh. I really hate watching Titus O’Neil wrestle, his power moves look painful. I’d rather fight Strowman… I like watching Big Cass wrestle though, Enzo too, even if he just got smashed and pinned by Strowman.

Before the ring is even cleared the big show’s music hits, he comes out, and he is in incredible shape after months of hard workouts outside the ring, The Big Show comes down to face Braun Strowman. The Big Show is still bigger. The just stare each other down. Strowman gets out of the ring, and talks shit on the way to the locker room.

The shark cage is hanging over the ring again, to mock Chris Jericho who has just come to the ring. He is fighting Roman Reigns for the US championship, I am so confused… Why do I put myself through this… anyone else want to write results? lol
Reigns takes control early in the match, and we go to commercial. If you read my reviews you will know how much I *LOVE* commercial breaks… sigh, I fast forward through commercials, go to far, can’t rewind, Jericho is in control now, makes a pin attempt on Reigns. Jericho drop kicks Reigns in the face, two count. Reigns gets up, Jericho goes for the code breaker but its reversed and Reigns power bombs him. Jericho kicks out, Owens apparently was on commentary but left to go to the ring and gets in and attacks Reigns, effectively causing a DQ and saving Jericho’s belt for now. Owens calls for the shark cage to be lowered, it looks like they plan on locking Reigns in it… Jericho gets Reigns up, Owens tries to lock him in, but it backfires, and Reigns locks Owens in it instead. Ha ha.  Jericho grabs the cage, and is picked up from the ring along with the cage, until Reigns knocks him off. Owens is screaming Reigns is laughing… Jericho goes to get up and gets a big spear from Reigns. Owens is still locked in the cage.

We come back from break, they are letting Owens out of the cage. Its announced this Sundays Championship match will be a no DQ match.

Now a pre recorded interview with Charlotte about defending her belt against Bayley at the Rumble. She talks about how its a family tradition. Charlotte talks more shit on Bayley, then says its true she is privileged and her dad did get her in with one phone call but no one cares… eww More blah blah blah… Bayleys interview seemed more genuine, this seems so rehearsed.

Back from break we have Nia Jax coming to the ring. she is fighting Ray Lyn. This poor girl is gonna get killed. Yup over in like 20 seconds. Nia cuts a promo about Sasha Banks, and how she broke her. Sasha’s hits, she comes down to the ring limping slightly on one crutch. She gets to ringside and swats nia in the leg, then gets in the ring and pummels Nia with the crutch. When Nia came at Sasha she held open the rope, Nia fell through to the floor, Sash gave her a couple of knees then left.

After yet another break we come back and Rich Swan the Cruiserweight champion comes to the ring, his opponent is Noam Dar, who is accompanied by Swan’s ex Alicia Fox. Yet another fast paced match, as expected. Enjoying this match a lot but seriously it did not need a commercial break in the middle. Alicia Fox is being mildly distracting at ring side, Swann has mainly been in control of this match, and picks up a fairly easy win. After the match he calls out Neville, telling him they don’t have to wait until Sunday. Nevilles music hits, and he comes to the ring looking pretty fierce. Swann dives to the outside and beats on Neville, who quickly backs down. They are fighting for the belt on Sunday as well.

We come back from yet another break with Noam Dar asking if Rich Swann if they can be ok over the stealing of the Alicia Fox, her part of the promo was super weak… Meh… I care about this story line as much as Rich Swann seemed to care about Alicia.

Goldberg is now making his way from the depths of the venue to the ring. apparently they must keep  him away from all other wrestlers, he is that dangerous… or something. He comes out in a giant pyro, surprised his face isn’t melted. Goldberg is slightly over with the crowd, shockingly. He’s got bloody spots on his head, as he clearly just shaved it with a bic. his head is bleeding like he got busted open… I don’t think he knows he is bleeding. I don’t know if I care what he is talking about, all I see is his bloody head. Paul Heyman comes out to address Goldberg, talks about who we may see Goldberg fight in the battle. He teases Goldberg vs Brock Lesner at the Royal Rumble, Lesnar comes out to the entrance way, staring at Goldberg in the ring… I imagine this match might be popular among children… Who don’t know any better. Heyman says Lesner will eliminate Goldberg, Goldberg asks him if hes gonna come down there like a man or stand there like a dum bass… lulz. Lesner heads to the ring… but he’s still a dumb ass to me. Lesner gets into the ring. The room goes dark, and The Undertakers bell tolls, and he appears in the ring. He looks really good. Lesner looks dumbfounded, Goldberg looks unbothered.

And… its over. They managed 7 matches, at least 8 promos, and too many commercials to count. Looking forward to the Rumble this Sunday though, as its one of my favorite PPV’s. You can catch it live on the WWE Network!

RAW

Monday Night Raw Recap 1/16/17

Raw opens with a memorial to Jimmy “Superfly” Snuka.

REALLY NO 10 BELL SALUTE?

Then goes directly into a strange MLK/Black History mashup, which is odd, because I am not sure Vince likes black people, after all look at how he treated Kamala.

Roman Reigns comes out to the ring, empty handed after last weeks screw job by Chris Jericho and Kevin Owens. Cuts a promo for the Royal Rumble.

Paul Heyman comes out while Roman is still in the ring and announces the return of Brock Lesner… (yuck…) The crowd is chanting Goldberg… (seriously?) Heyman goes on to explain how the Rumble works… Roman trolls Heyman, and Jericho and Owens come out to the entrance way… nothing but talking. I barely remember what wrestling looks like at this point, and this promo is seriously boring.
Then… Seth Rollins comes out, OH GOOD MORE PROMOS.

At least Seth Rollins sounds excited, like he actually WANTS TO fight!

Then Braun Strowman comes out… at least he doesn’t talk.

Then, of course, out comes Lesner, fake pumped up and as confused looking as ever. Rollins gets his wish and it breaks out in mayhem as Sami Zayn ran out of no where and attacks Strowman. This leaves us with Zayn and Lesner facing off… Lesner suplexes him. Strowman gets back in the ring… sounds like the live audience cares as much as I do… everyone else gets back involved… Lesner gives RR the F5 to end this segment. Meh.

They announce a few of the entrants into the Rumble including The Undertaker.

Rusev and Curt Hawkins are in the Ring, Big Cass and Enzo come out, looking a bit more intense than usual. A short, yet decent match ends with Enzo getting the pin on Rusev.

Ariya Daivari comes to the ring, his opponent is Lince Dorado! Nice. It really makes me happy to see folks who worked hard get to the big time, even  if the match ended with him tapping out.

They come back with some highlights from the UK tournament, available on the WWE Network. 

Then they show a video of Nia Jax attacking Sasha Banks during her medical evaluation earlier in the day.

Cesaro’s music hits, he comes to the entrace way, then Sheamus’s music hits and they post on the entrance ramp, they are defending the Tag Team titles against Anderson and Gallows, whom I really hate their gimmick, they remind me of neo nazi’s…
Cesaro and Anderson start it off, Anderson gets worked over Cesaro tagged Sheamus in, then Sheamus tags Cesaro back in Anderson takes over and tags Gallows in. Gallows elbows Cesaro in the chest… I guess he doesn’t know how to wrestle? He tags Anderson back in…  it goes back and forth for a bit, all the guys are fighting. Gallows kicks Sheamus in the face, and… commercial break. sigh.
They come back from break with Gallows and Anderson in control, do a big double team on Sheamus, no pin. Sheamus finally tags out, as does Gallows, Cesaro unloads on Anderson, near fall. Swiss-1-9… lol, kick out, Cesaro knocks Anderson down again, 2 count. Cesaro gives Anderson the big swing into the sharp shooter, Gallows breaks the hold. Anderson is now in control, but Cesaro fights back, Anderson gives Cesaro a big spine buster but Sheamus breaks the pin. Sheamus runs into the ref… Uh oh… Cesaro gets worked over by both Anderson and Gallows, new ref comes in and Anderson and Gallows get the pin, and the belts… oh no wait… the won by DQ because Sheamus knocked out the ref, so no belts. Ha.

A Jimmy “Superfly” Snuka video montage, with voice overs from superstars, and bits of Jimmy speaking, tweets from WWE wrestlers past and present about Snuka’s passing.
Still no 10 bell salute, which I feel is super disrespectful and shows how out of touch WWE has gotten from wrestling tradition. sigh.

The come back with a locker room promo with Sami Zayn having a awkward convo with Roman Reigns and Seth Rollins… Pointless…

Rich Swann the current Cruiser-weight champion comes to the ring, Neville comes running out of the crowd and attacks Swann. Is this a match or just an attack? There was no bell but there are 3 refs in the ring. Tony Nese comes out and attacks Swann.
I guess this must be a lead up for the Rumble?

The New Day comes out, as happy and shiny as ever. Feeding the crowd Booty O’s on the way to the ring. Crowd seems happier to see them, then anyone else so far, Chanting “New Day Rocks”. They cut a promo about the Royal Rumble and how the 3 of them are entering, as individuals. They insist whoever wins, means they all win.  I really hope this isn’t the beginning of the end, I can’t take the pain of the New Day breaking up. Titus O’Neil shows up at ringside, saying he doesn’t want to be in The New day, he wants to replace The New Day. He’s asking them to hook him up with one of their spots in the Rumble. They say no, he says he will take it, hes going to wrestle one of them for their spot. Big E accepts the challenge. Titus and Big E will wrestle after this… I hope Titus wrestles better than he cuts promos.

The match starts after the break, and O’Neil dominates the match, however it comes off like he’s just some big guy they stuck in the ring after training him for the day. Its almost disrespectful to Big E. He finally comes back, and hits O’Neil with The Big Ending, and wins the match. Titus O’Neil is a monster, but he needs a lot of polishing.

Charlotte comes out, cuts a promo about how she achieved her success and won the women’s championship. She then trashes Bayley for being “average” and the fans too. She then shows photos of Bayley back in her Fan days as a kid, and continues to make fun of her. Then goes on about how when Bayley was a poetry writing fan girl, she was training and playing division 1 volleyball. She pulls out an “old essay” from Bayley, and continues to berate her. Bayleys music hits, she comes to the ring, looking really pissed and chases Charlotte out of the ring. Bayley then gets the mic and tells Charlotte this is isn’t necessary. Bayley tells Charlotte, she is not embarrassed of ashamed of her passion and love for WWE. Bayley makes fun of Charlotte for having her dad get her in, when Bayleys dad did whatever he could to get her to shows growing up. This is probably the best promo of the night so far. Bayley made up a poem for Charlotte… Roses are red, violets are blue, at Royal Rumble I will defeat you. She then spits out two more poems off the top of her head about beating Charlotte at the Royal Rumble.

Is this a wrestling show or a talk show? We are 2.5 hours in and only 4 matches!!!

Cruiserweight match, Brian Kendrick vs Cedrick Alexander, Alexander takes control early in the match, Kendrick eye rakes him and takes over, Kendrick struggles to get Alexander into a full nelson but Alexander breaks the hold and takes back over until Kendrick cuts him off with a elbow. Kendrick tries to corner Alexander but it doesn’t work and he takes back over, gets a 2 count, but Kendrick breaks the pin. Kendrick gets Alexander in another submission and Alica Fox comes to the ring. (Alexander broke up with her last week on 205 Live) Kendrick chases Fox outside the ring for a moment, gets back into the ring, but Alexander is read, gets him with the lumbar chuck, and gets the pin.

Promo with Nia Jax about Sasha. Nia is proud she broke her, and the buzz is now about her.

Return from break with Alicia Fox talking about her breakup with Cedrick Alexander, freaks out… walks off…

Hall of Fame Announcement, First Inductee of 2017 is Olympic Gold Medalist and former Champion Kurt Angle.

6 man Tag team match!  It’s Kevin Owens, Chris Jericho and  Braun Strowman VS Roman Reigns, Seth Rollins and Sami Zayn.
Match starts, frankly I have no idea whats going on… 3 hrs in I am too tired for this.
Poor Sami Zayn, he is clearly going to take the brunt of the abuse in this match.
Match goes back and forth, I think Roman Reigns and Kevin Owens work well off each other. Forgot Strowman was at ringside, hes a monster, but has zero personality.
Commercial… again… in the middle of a match. I hate this shit. I hate it so much it makes me not want to finish this report… sigh. (Though I complain, I pause it on the DVR, so I can fast forward past commercials… ha!)
They come back and Roman Reigns is getting his ass beat by Owens and Jericho, and the ref if yelling at Rollins. Apparently Reigns got super kicked by Owens during the break. Owens gets reigns into a submission in the middle of the ring, but Reigns fights out of it and gives him a Samoan drop. They both get the tag, Rollins and Jericho, Rollins is in control, Rollins takes out Jericho on the outside, at the same time Zayn takes out Owens, Rollins gets Jericho back in the ring, 2 count on Jericho kick out. Rollins goes for the pedigree, but Jericho counters, they do this twice, Strowman gets in the ring after Jericho tags him in. Zayn runs in attacks Strowman, Rollins tries to Pedigree Strowman, but gets back dropped instead. Reigns gets in on it with a super punch on Strowman, he still doesn’t fall, Rollins takes out Owens and Jericho on the outside, then Zayn takes Strowman out with a high body Lateral press, but only gets the two count. Zayn gets up and runs at Strowman, but Strowman cuts him off with a clothesline, then Strowman power slams Zayn for the 3 count.

After the match Strowman continues to abuse Zayn, but Rollins comes and slaps him with a chair, then Reigns spears him.  More mayhem as they tear apart the announce table to throw Strowman through it but Owens and Jericho come to his rescue. more fighting, on the entrance ramp, Kevin Owens gets the chair and wrecks everyone. He then grabs Reigns to set him up for a power bomb through the announce table.

FINALLY ITS OVER!

Final notes: Hella pissed about no 10 Bell Salute for Snuka, it was disrespectful to him and to tradition. Disappointed there wasn’t a women’s match, and lastly, I really want to see more wrestling and less talking.

Make sure you catch the Royal Rumble this weekend on the WWE Network!

RAW

Monday Night Raw Recap 12/19/16

Raw opens with a promo featuring Chris Jericho, Kevin Owens, and Mick Foley. Mick Foley tells Jericho he will be suspended in a cage above the ring at The Royal Rumble, Foley shows Jericho the safety of the cage, “inadvertently” (yeah right) locking him into the cage, then “mistakenly” calls for it to be lifted off the ground, leaving Jericho begging for his life out of fear of heights.

Big Cass vs Rusev, Rusev wins by DQ.  Meh… Best part of the match was the entrance.

Backstage, Jericho has gotten out of the cage, and Kevin Owens is trying to console him, while he is still in the midst of a full fledged panic attack from being suspended above the ring. I feel your pain bro.

Sasha Banks comes out to the ring on one crutch with a brace on her left knee, She cuts a promo about giving it her all, tapping out twice and almost getting her leg broken, going to war with Charlotte, and them making history in women’s wrestling. She says while she hurts from losing the belt, but the better woman won, asks Charlotte to come out so she can look her in the eyes and congratulate her. Silence for 30 seconds, then Nia Jax music hits, she comes to ringside staring down Sasha banks the whole way, entering the ring to look at Sasha, then cuts a promo, saying “she may be a boss of the sheep out there, but would never be the boss of her,… shes week, wounded and a nothing but a little girl”, then kicks the crutch out from under Sasha, then attacks the hurt knee of the former women’s champion. Damn.

 

Mick Foley does a backstage promo with Cesaro and Sheamus, about being proud of them, presents them with new raw tag team titles… as soon as they get the new titles they start arguing… Foley is called away to deal with Braun Strowman throwing refs and tables around, looking for Sami Zayn. Mick Foley asks Braun to take the night off, he threatens hes wants Sami or else.

Cedric Alexander  vs Noam Dar starts, and immediately goes to commercial break. All I have learned thus far is they have heat from something that happened on the new cruiserweight show 205 Live which is exclusive to the WWE Network. This match is fast paced, Alicia Foxx is at ringside as Cedric’s girlfriend. Cedric takes control early in the match, and easily picks up the win. Bonus: Austin Aries on commentary

Noam Dar breathlessly cuts a promo from ringside, saying he wants Alicia. Ewww creepy.

So far, way more talking than wrestling…

Can’t fast forward through terrible commercials, despite pausing dvr, BOOOO

The New Day makes their first entrance to RAW without the tag belts. Cuts a positive promo about losing just means they can win again, as they get into the ring Cesaro’s music hits, followed by Sheamus’s music, they cut a promo before making their way to the ring, where of course they are arguing again…  New Day Shames Sheamus for thinking they were congratulating him, they were thanking Cesaro. Sheamus doesn’t care what anyone thinks… Sheamus thinks he can hold the titles for 20 years… lol The New day has the POP (Power of Positivity) Anderson and Gallows come to the ring… Then the Shining Stars… Then a brawl breaks out, finally some fighting.
When we come back from commercial there is a spontaneous 4 team tag match with two teams on each side, The New Day, and the New Tag Champs Team Up, and Anderson and Gallows are with the Shining Stars, too much to follow to write about. I hate commercial breaks in the middle of matches too. Match ends with a spin and a sharpshooter from Cesaro on one of the Shining Stars.

Big Cass and Enzo talking in the locker room, Enzo gets a letter, He is required to go to mandatory sensitivity training tonight for “exposing himself in the workplace” on November 21st. (seriously???)

Neville comes to to the ring to cut a promo about destroying all the cruiserweights, as we totally needed to see ANOTHER promo on this episode of RAW. He says hes going to 205 live to obliterate the division. Rich Swan comes out, tells Neville he used to look up to him. Neville demands respect as “the True King of The cruiserweights” (wtf) Then Brian Kendrick comes out, cutting more promos, seriously, can you people all shut up and fight already? Kendrick and Neville team up on Rich Swan, TJP comes out to save Swan and gets his ass beat too.

Sensitivity training, Enzo, Jinder Mahal and others were sitting in a circle with a therapist. Hell I think I need one after all these promos. Does anyone fight on this show anymore?

Sin Cara vs Titus O’Neil, No contest as in the first 40 seconds Braun Strowman comes out and destroys them both. Mick Foley comes out pleading for Strowman to stop, Strowman threw Sin Cara through a tree and the pile of gifts, then knocked over the Christmas display.

Another backstage promo with Kevin Owens and Chris Jericho, sigh…

Charlotte Flair the new RAW Women’s Champion comes to the ring, hey its another promo! Bailey’s music hits, she comes out dancing. Charlotte is mad at being interrupted, Bailey just wants to congratulate her. Charlotte tells her to join the audience she should be paying for a ticket, Bailey declares she wants to begin a rivalry with Charlotte. Bailey challenges Charlotte to a fight after Charlotte says she isn’t good enough. Charlotte accepts, and calls for a ref. Finally wrestling… after this commercial break. Charlotte controls the first part of the match Bailey gains steam, another commercial break. these breaks really ruin the momentum of matches. We come back from break Charlotte is in control. Bailey finely comes back, Charlotte cuts her off regains control, but is cut short when Bailey pins her in this non championship bout.

More sensitivity training… sigh. Another commercial, Sensitivity training graduation ending with Rusev and Jinder beating the shit out of Enzo and putting him through a table.

Main Event, Seth Rollins and US Champion Roman Reigns vs Universal Champion Kevin Owens and Chris Jericho I’m exhausted from all the talking so it’s hard to pay attention and write. As much as I like the guys in the ring, I could care less about this match, so honestly its a little boring. How many times are we going to watch these guys wrestle before the rumble? This is why WWE needs to bring back jobbers, instead of jobbing regular talent. Braun Strowman ran out and attacked Roman Reigns just as the match was getting interesting, bell was rung, match is over. Boooo

While it is better than it was at times in the past, RAW still has a lot to work on, seriously 75% of this show is talking, I’d like to see them cut down on that tremendously in 2017, its really annoying.

So that was it, I don’t always watch RAW, and usually just catch PPV’s these days, but I figured since I had the opportunity I would recap it here for you!

 

RAW0 Comments

Roman Reigns Almost Ruined My Life

The main event is set for for Clash of Champions on Sunday October 25 and it’s a personal dream match of mine. Two of the most talented wrestlers in the world today, and more importantly former ROH World Champions. And to think it was almost ruined by golden boy fallen from grace. Roman Reigns.

So untalented Roman thinks he deserves a Universal Title shot against the supreme athlete himself, Kevin Owens. So he gets the option from the clueless GM Mick Foley to win a match againstOwens and gain entry into my dream match of Kevin Owens vs Seth Rollins for the top prize.

The WWE would totally do something like this. How dare they toy with my emotions. I waited my whole adult life for Kevin Owens to reach this level. It’s not fair he had to spend 14 years toiling on the independents. Not that ROH was ever an indy. Not only would I be denied a proper singles match with my heroes, but KO would have to get buried by and job to the spoiled Reigns.

But alas this was not to be, but the ride was a roller coaster of emotions that no one could ever deserve. I rejoiced when Seth Rollins attacked KO causing a DQ for Roman. Then I had a near heart attack when the match was restarted by Foley. Why would he do that? Roman got booed to death tonight, not like that’s anything new! Thankfully Rusev made a shocking return from his honeymoon with Lana to go after Roman. I would do the same thing. In a not so rare moment of idiocy, Roman was so distracted by punching Rusev in the mouth that the superior intelligence of Owens prevailed and put him away.

Roman loses, we all win. Kevin Owens vs Seth Rollins is happening for the Universal Championship and it will be the best thing to ever happen in my life.

Watch WWE Clash of Champions live on the WWE Network

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